Fwam (fuh WAAM') n. spam forwarded by friends

On my wall is a small plaque which reads:

I can complain because rose bushes have thorns
or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses...

This reminds me to cheer up as I delete SPAM from my inbox. Yes, I can complain because the internet gives me SPAM or I can rejoice that SPAM signifies there IS an internet.

Love the internet, hate SPAM.

I have a SPAM filter and I'm not afraid to use it. So yes, most of the viagra-selling, penis-enlarging, breast-enhancing, money-lending SPAM automatically drops into a black hole. This doesn't help my Blackberry however, (Yes, I have one... yes, I love it... take a deep breath... now get over it) my Blackberry accesses email from the server, PRE-spam filter. Several times a day I delete... delete... delete... Yes, it bugs me to have to do it. But if that was the extent of my spam issues I wouldn't be writing this. No. Because there is a form of SPAM no spam filter can touch. I'm talking about FORWARDED SPAM... or what I dub: Fwam .

You know the special Fwam I'm talking about, too. Jokes: or more precisely the same joke forwarded around and around a thousand times among your group of friends. Ha Ha Ha... okay, enough already! Urgent warnings: the 'this really happened to someone I know' emails... yeah right, take two clicks this link Snopes and call me in the morning. How about the maudlin story emails which order me to forward the email on to at least 10 friends to show that I love them. I'm just saying NO! I won't do it... specifically because I love them.

You shouldn't either! I implore you! Just say NO!

OH, and how about those propaganda emails. These I REALLY hate! Religion... pro-Iraq Conflict... pro-Bush (seriously, what ARE they thinking?) and staunchly Republician propaganda like this one that I received with a subject line of: US SENATOR UNHURT IN CRASH.

Seriously, this was from a friend of mine who knows I'm NOT a Republician. What's wrong with these people? I wrote an anti-death penalty screenplay for God's sake. And they think I'm going to think this is funny?

I get anti-Bush jokes sent to me... funny ones, too (KR, DS you know who you are) I don't forward those emails on to my friends who are responsible er, voted for him. That would be taking advantage of the friendship, wouldn't it? Or... is it just me?